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Figuring It All Out
With all due respect to Susan M. Garrett and "Brown Paper Packages..."

"Are you sure we should tell Spike about this?" Willow asked, struggling to keep up with the grim-faced Buffy and Giles, who were striding rapidly along the road to the cemetary.

"Yes," Buffy said. "He's as involved in it as Giles and me."

"I don't understand why they didn't do me," Willow said. "I'm as much of a member of the group as Giles is. Way more than Spike."

Buffy gave her a disbelieving look. "Don't worry. I'm sure they'll get you next time."

"In fact, they've as much as promised it. For you and Xander," Giles said. "We must stop them before then."

They reached the crypt. Buffy swung open the door and burst in, Willow and Giles on her heels, shouting, "Spike! Spike! They've been making--"

She stopped dead, staring at the tableau in front of her.

"Uh, Buffy?" Willow said. "I think he already knows."

Spike looked up from the tomb where he was lying and pressing the action figures of himself and Buffy together in a passionate embrace. "Er, hello, Slayer."

There was a long, embarrassed silence.

"Really, Spike," Giles said finally. "Could you be any more distasteful?"

"Actually, I--I think so," Willow stammered, nudging Giles and pointing to the other pair of figures Spike had put together.

"Good heavens," Giles said, taking off his glasses.

"Well," Buffy said contemptuously, "at least he let you be on top."

Apparently, Spike had bought more than one set.


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